Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Google hates me and thinks im gay




Ive decided im trapped in google hell, ive been working for the past week or so using google's webmaster tools which are a pretty useful rescource. One of the tools show what keywords brought your website up and at what rank in the search your site was, here are a few keywords that where bringing up this site.



Google search Keywords


* "yahoo finaince" 3rd site a google search listed
* "bleach taste in mouth" 9th site a google search listed
* "taste of pennies in mouth" 10th site a google search listed
* "doritos fight for the flavor" 36th site a google search listed


Now the only one out of that list that really applies to this site is my rant on the doritos fight for the flavor contest, the others make baddrink sound like a mouth fungus of some sort. Google has recrawled this site so it doesnt show up on theose searches anymore so at least baddrink no longer looks like something listerine will kill but there still is work to be done.



By getting google to recrawl the site now its even worse now even if i type baddrink into googles browser its the seventh page out of ten! Hell my geeklog profile comes up before the site with the name BADDRINK! Not only that but google isnt looking at any pages other then the main baddrink.com page, its ignoring the forums, the galleries, any old posts, everything.



To add insult to injury google now thinks im gay! At first they where subtle they slipped a google add in that said "are you gay" but now i notice that add at least four times a day.The adds are supposed to be custom tailored to keywords on the site. Then i signed up for this blog account via google and i put one rant on here , the one about the american idol fund raiser then i added google adds and the first ad was "are you gay" . What the hell is google picking up that i dont know? i did do that rant a while back about the wizard of OZ but surely thats not enough to tip the scales and make me gay is it?




Dear google gods oh what did i do to offend thee? I swear i only used yahoo once, and that time with ask.com was nothing more then a one time fling. I beg of thee forgive me and it wont happen again. Please oh please oh great google release me from my google hell , oh and im not gay.



The google gods advised me a sitemap is what i needed so after trying to figure out just how the hell a sitemap is made. Its only taken me a week to get it done and now according to yahoo its great but google has found 23 errors in it. So if anyone wonders if im dead fear not im hear alive and well trapped in google hell.

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